Leadership roles are heavy shoes to fill. Skills and experience are part of the fit, but a great leader also carries the weight of their responsibility gracefully in ways a toxic boss can’t.
Some stumbling and falling while you look for balance is normal, and sometimes it’s easy to find shortcuts and even well-intentioned leaders end up walking all over their subordinates. Knowingly or not, they go crushing valuable talent and growth opportunities, and the results are tangible. In fact, research reveals that 57% of people quit due to toxic bosses.
There are even courses on the internet teaching people how to deal with a toxic boss. (Yup, it’s that bad!) But, coping is not to be confused with fixing. The only way to fix dysfunctional leadership is by taking steps to improve as leaders and managers.
Here’s a better question to ask, “Is my leadership style unhealthy? Am I a toxic boss?”.
This is an awkward, but crucial question. This is not a diagnosis or a labeling exercise. It’s a quick talk on some of the most common toxic traits a leader may exhibit, whether that be wittingly or unwittingly.
And hey, we know – you may not be doing these toxic things on purpose, and you may not even know why these things are problematic, but the fact that you’re reading this article means you’ve got the courage to make some changes where needed. This is the whole purpose of the article. If we can see it, we can fix it. Remove the “toxic” from a toxic boss, and you’re left with just ‘boss’, right? Let’s begin.
1. Apathy
A toxic boss may avoid all sentiments to avoid sentimental errors. People are fundamentally emotional beings, who can’t do their best if their basic emotional needs, such as kindness and warmth, are not respected.
Life is unpredictable. Colleagues fall ill, or they might need to clock out for some other personal emergency. “No, I don’t care. I need this done first” is what an apathetic, toxic boss would say.
Of course it’s important to have deadlines and accountability, but it’s even smarter to develop a model that accounts for these sudden events. Better risk mitigation strategies, delegation, and backup plans help reduce stress when things pop up. An empathetic boss even knows how to handle a bad coworker.
Being able to cut some slack for humans going through human events can go a long way in a team environment. Check up on colleagues frequently. Listen to their grievances. “Oh, stop being so sensitive; it’s nothing” or “I don’t have time for this.” are apathetic things toxic bosses say. Invalidating and dismissive responses like these from a boss can break an employee’s morale.
Remember, the moments that test your empathy also come with an opportunity to be a kinder leader and make a difference.
2. Mind games
Workplaces can be a battleground for ego and power play, especially for a toxic boss. Abuse of power can look like: asking employees for unfair favors just because they are not in a position to upset you, coercion, manipulation, gaslighting, lying, and more.
“Why haven’t you sent the report I asked for?” is something a toxic boss would say when it’s clear they haven’t asked for any reports.
For example, if your teammates feel the need to document every interaction with you, then there’s definitely a lack of trust. Unfortunately, it’s far too common in today’s workplace.1 in 3 employees don’t trust their employers.
Competent leaders like documentation because it keeps the team on the same page, not to hold it against them later.
“You’re the only one who’s complained about this campaign; everyone else is okay with it” invalidates and isolates. A good leader understands that a strong team leaves no member behind. They won’t need to pit teammates against each other.
Secure leaders, above all, want secure employees, and your actions can go a long way to making your employees feel secure.
(Psst. If you are reading this because you have a toxic boss, blink twice andclick just once. We’re coming to save you right now).
3. Micromanagement
“I am a perfectionist” could sometimes be a nicer way of saying “Only I know how to do everything right”. As a leader, one may have enough evidence to support their superiority — years of experience, accolades, and knowledge.
Even then, getting down in the trenches and toiling yourself isn’t actually the best way to create perfection. The more you work, the less your teammates will, creating imbalance and distrust. It’s a vicious cycle that deepens their reliance on you and possibly builds resentment on both sides of the table.
So you still want perfection – the bad news is asking for status updates at every stage and every hour only adds to the anxiety and sends out a message that you doubt their intelligence and skills. Who would want to work with someone who doesn’t trust them enough?
Good leaders understand the power of delegation and occupy themselves with more important jobs than the nitty-gritty (you’re a manager for a reason, right?). Doing so will free up your time and space while also helping your teammates become independent self-starters.
It’s good to supervise and offer guidance from time-to-time, but it mustn’t consume and distract.
4. Breaking boundaries
Hopefully, most of us know that racist remarks or inappropriate physical advances at a colleague are BIG, career-ruining violations.
But, there are more subtle things that cause discomfort that might go by unflagged. Forcing them to work-from-office when they had initially been promised a remote setup, calling subordinates after work hours or when they’re on vacation, expecting them to work overtime — these are all a violation of boundaries.
“Well, I offered to compensate them for it generously.” or “It’s their job! They should already be doing it!” are things toxic bosses say.
A respectful leader knows they can only ask the employee and incentivize extra effort, but even then, if it is something your employee isn’t comfortable with, it’s a boundary. Like all relationships, professional ones depend on both parties respecting each other’s boundaries.
A smart leader communicates their boundaries while also paying attention to their people’s comfort.
5. Praise-poaching
Praise-poaching is exactly what it sounds like. A colleague comes up with a great idea, but the boss presents it as their own. They may get full marks for presenting well, but they won’t be getting goodwill and friends. When we give credit where it’s due, we open avenues for growth.
Praise poaching can sometimes be subtle, like showering an employee with praise in private and none in public or not recommending high-performers in important rooms.
Secure leaders share appreciation. They aren’t threatened by someone else getting the limelight. They wouldn’t gatekeep opportunities or achievements; they would be the team’s bridge to the higher-ups. Having incredible, talented people on your team should be seen as an asset to be celebrated.
Conclusion
You may have noticed that all of these toxic traits cause distrust in the workplace. A secure employee is a great employee, and if you can inspire safety and empowerment in the workplace, you’re well on your way to great leadership! These are just some signs of a toxic boss, however, we all know they come in many shapes and sizes. To quote Spider-Man, “With great power comes great responsibility”.
A great leader hones their power and owns their responsibility. However, leaders aren’t born; they are crafted with the right attitude and guidance. Take your leadership capabilities a notch higher with PowerUp. Choose from tons of leadership development courses designed to bring out the best leaders of today and tomorrow. .
